My Application to Become a Ghost Hunter

Amy,

I came across your website as part of research I have been involved with.  I was shocked that there was an organization such as yours so close to St. Louis. I feel P***** is a strong well regarded organization.  I would like to offer my services to your team.  Hopefully my duties would be to assist with tracking down and disposing of any unruly ghosts.  I have a keen eye for the paranormal and I am an eager and quick learner.  After living with a ghost I can honestly say that I really dislike them. 

Additionally, my friends joke that I must have been born with no adrenalin glands because it is very difficult to scare me. My brother Carlos has tried many times to rattle me and has never succeeded.  As a joke he once hid in my bedroom closet, with the lights off, for several hours.  When I arrived home he jumped from the closet and lunged at me with a knife and a lit cigarette.  Was I scared?  No.  I just turned on an episode of Matlock and went to bed.  I have been more scared of some of his dates.  They all seem to resemble Ernest Borgnine.

For this reason I believe I can catch many ghosts.  Although I offer no prior qualifications or pedigree, I will do what it takes to get the job done.  If necessary, I would even wrestle with a ghost until they are too tired to continue haunting and then I will catch them.  Again, I speak from experience when I say that I truly hate them. They are not very smart. I will be able to trick them.  I am very clever.  

My point is that I think that I will make an excellent addition to your team.  Please email me and let me know of any open positions and where I can apply.  I could be a trusted ally in the fight against the paranormal.  I live in Lake St. Louis so I can be available as needed.  Thank you for your time. Hope to hear from you soon.

Thanks,

Brad Fith

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From: Amy

To: Brad

Brad,

Thank you for your email to P*****.  We are currently not accepting new members, however, if you would like me to send over an application for future consideration let me know. There are several other local teams, which may or may not be accepting new members, but as we don’t network with any of them I am unable to point you in one direction or another on that.

Thanks,
Amy